Derailment at its finest

Posted: March 19, 2009 in life

Ok so I had a rough night last night. I played too late and lost too much. Que cera cera. But days like today make me appreciate what we get away w/calling a career and the lifestyle that comes w/it. Let me explain…

So I’m exhausted when I wake up at 9 to watch the games(I hate sports on the west coast). To make matters worse my roomies are already showering themselves in bud light. By 2 o’clock they are all pretty life owned and decide it’s time to start messing w/the sober kid…

I’m minding my own business making myself chilli for dinner when my day derails. I finish my food and put it away only to find out moments later that it has disappeared. Now I don’t think I’ve painted a clear enough pic of what’s going on here; When I make chili I make enough for the week/the roomies if they want any. So we’re talking roughly a 10lb crock pot full of food vanished from existence. After 15 mins of “hot/cold” I find my meal. Ok haha it was kinda funny. 15 mins again it’s gone. Enter the beginnings of prank war ’09 Berkey vs the 3 stooges. As I type this my chili is still M.I.A. and I was locked in a closet for roughly 5 mins. In the meantime I’ve torn one of my roommate’s boxers off through the means of an atomic wedgie, I’ve sent a mass text from another’s phone claiming to have gotten a hooker prego, I tore all the cheese and toppings off of the pizza they ordered for dinner, and they don’t know it yet but there may or may not be a piece of raw chicken in each of their rooms in the beginning stages of rotting. On St. Patty’s day we had a war w/ping-pong balls, drilling each other in the face from close range(I still have welts on my back). I feel that this is merely the start of what could be a never-ending battle(my ego would never allow a truce). I’ll be sure to update the status of the hell that is my house :)

As I laid down to sleep I heard the beautiful sound of my roommate pissing all over himself, you see I unscrewed our bathroom light and ceran(sp?) wrapped the toilet. Soon after some rules were established…
1. no pranks during sleeping hours
2. no pranking things that go in our mouths

While the rules were being established my bed was flipped over

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